Someday at Christmas
by RoboTitaness
Summary: Seeing her best friend grievously injured on her couch had Lily Potter deliberating her part in the war. Part 15 of 25 Days of Christmas.


**Title:** Someday at Christmas  
 **Author:** Fr0st6yte (RoboTitaness)  
 **Fandom:** Harry Potter  
 **Characters:** Remus Lupin, Lily Potter  
 **Genre:** Friendship, Hurt/Comfort  
 **Summary:** Seeing her best friend grievously injured on her couch had Lily Potter deliberating her part in the war.

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Harry wouldn't ever remember his first Christmas. He was only a few months old at the time, after all. But it was a happy one, even with Voldemort's shadow hanging over everyone at the time.

At least, it was happy after Remus was found.

The werewolf had been disappearing for months now, randomly showing up at the Potters' front step, all torn up, looking worse than he ever had after a full moon. He wouldn't tell anyone where he went, no matter how much the others hounded him. He would stay for a day or two before disappearing again. All he could say that it was for an Order mission.

But this time he'd been gone for three months, with no contact. No patronus, no letter, nothing. The Marauders and Lily were getting worried, though they tried to hide it from the baby. However Harry still picked up on it and was getting increasingly unsettled. By late December, he stayed up late, fussy and refusing to sleep and give his parents a respite. When Dumbledore had come to them, voicing concerns for Remus' disappearance as well, Sirius and Peter had started going on longer missions, searching for their friend. James ached to be out with them, but was convinced to stay home with Lily and Harry.

Lily herself was itching to find Remus. She chafed at continuing hiding, but taking care of Harry kept her busy. As Christmas came closer, however, she continually hounded Dumbledore and Sirius for information.

"Nothing yet, Lily," Sirius said as he walked into the house, not even letting the woman ask.

"At all?" she still asked.

"Don't you think I'd tell you if there was?" Sirius snapped back, before hurrying past her to find James. Lily glared after him, trying to remind herself that Sirius was just as worried.

But that didn't stop her from growing angry, and James, when he walked into the kitchen, quickly picked up on this.

"Lils, we're all worried for him," he murmured. "Lighten up on Sirius."

"I know," she replied. "But I hate being cooped up inside while he's out there."

"I know you do," James said patiently. "I do too. But we need to be here for Harry." He drew her into his embrace. "They'll find him and drag him back here."

"And when we do, you guys need to lock him up so he can't disappear again," Sirius added, coming into the room with Harry. "I've gotten him to sleep for now," he added as Lily looked up. As he passed the baby over, he caught her eye and they both exchanged apologizing looks.

"He'll be here until next Christmas, at least," Lily promised.

"Now come. We need to finish decorating the living room. Christmas is only next week, after all." With that, both boys went back out of the kitchen, having an age-old debate of the decorations they'll put up on the tree. Lily shook her head as they argued and lifted Harry higher on her hip, and finished cooking dinner.

Not long after, she stiffened, fishing for her wand when a flash flew by next to her. She quickly followed the patronus as the phoenix flew straight for James.

"Found Remus. Coming to Godric's Hollow. Get your Healer's kit." Dumbledore's voice disappeared with the patronus leaving three very white faces, with hope dawning on all of them.

"How badly do you think?" Sirius asked as James disappeared up the stairs. Lily only shrugged, placing Harry down on his crib in the back of the room.

"We'll see," James answered grimly, handing Lily her emergency kit and holding his own, fuller, kit. Seven knocks erupted at the door the next minute and James and Sirius ran forward to open it. Their curses gave Lily an idea of how bad it was, and she took a deep breath, readying herself.

Hours later, and after depleting most of Lily and James' kits, Remus was sleeping soundly on the Potters' couch, with Lily watching over him. James and Sirius were in the kitchen, talking to Dumbledore and Gideon, who had found their friend.

Lily ignored the cadence of their voices, focusing more on the stuttered breathing that Remus was doing. Harry was in her lap, somehow still asleep after all the action that occurred around him. Cuts and bruises and bandages covered Remus' body, hiding every injury from view. Multiple blankets were wrapped around him, but he still shivered slightly. Lily reached over and smoothed his hair, thankful he was getting sleep, rather than just being unconscious.

"Lily?" The quiet voice broke through her thoughts and she looked down to see Remus blinking his eyes drowsily.

"Remus?" she asked just as softly. "Welcome home, dear." Remus tried lifting his head and Lily shook her own, patting him back down. "No getting up right now."

"Don't think I can either way," he replied, closing his eyes, but he didn't fall back asleep. "How long?"

"It's been five hours since Gideon found you." Lily continued running her fingers through his hair and he relaxed slightly, loosening his tight body. Lily inwardly shuddered as she imagined the pain he had to be in. Why did terrible things keep happening to her family?

"Don't worry, Evans," Again, Remus showed how clearly he knew how to read her. "I'll be fine."

"How could you say that?" she hissed. "You can barely move, Remus!"

"But I'm alive," he countered. "And I'll heal up and go back to fighting Death Eaters in not time."

"You're not going anywhere anytime soon," Lily said sternly.

"Evans, we're running low on able fighters."

"Which you are not right now."

"But I will be."

"Not for another year, if I have anything to say about it."

"Lily, I have to go back."

"I don't even know what it is you're doing, Remus!" She realized her voice had risen in volume when Harry shifted and she stopped until he relaxed again and continued more quietly, "I don't want to see you this hurt again, Remus." She averted her eyes from his.

"Lily," he started. "Lily, please look at me." Unable to refuse that voice, she did. He was looking at her sadly, his amber eyes understanding but defiant all the same. "We can't stop fighting now. Not yet." He looked down at Harry and smiled. "We're fighting for him, Lily. For his future. How can we stop fighting for that?"

He didn't promise that he wouldn't get hurt. He didn't promise that he wouldn't go back. But Lily knew he would never promise that. Not Remus. Never a promise that he knew he may not be able to complete.

But as Lily looked at her friend, her brother, she knew that it wouldn't matter. Because he'd continue fighting to get back to them, to protect them and to care for them. And when James and Sirius, and the newly arrived Peter, came back into the room, and converged on their friend, she was sure she'd see a Christmas without the fear but with all her family.

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 **Cross posted on AO3 (Fr0st6yte)**

 **Find me on Tumblr: fr0st6yte**


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